Saturday, July 27, 2013

Weather can really affect one's vacation and other musings!

This year, I've been impressed by how much weather affects our vacation plans! 

1. How weather affects a village visit vacation: The first set of photos were from our visit to someone's village home.  Our friend had planned various outside activity but it rained for the first few hours we were there... as you can see we opted for indoor activities.  Later we went out and appreciated the local chorus who came, and the children's fort that they made for our kids.  But I know it caused some stress to our friends, and various visitors who would have stopped by didn't stop by due to the rain. 



 2. How weather affects an April visit to England:  Somehow the visions of tulips and daffodils (as per ) were replaced with lots of huddling and running from the wind.  That said, many other good things outweighed the skipping through pastoral England plans!


 3. How weather affects a family vacation to Coastal Carolina.  My sister and I realized several days into our "beach fest" plans with four children that her two bedroom house might not pass muster as an alternative to tiring kids out at the beach.  On one of the last days, we said, let's take them to the beach in the rain.  Thankfully, no thunderstorms to deter us.

 4. How weather affects the 4th of July.  Somehow the fourth is quintessentially a sunny day holiday.  So, plan B.  The movies-- and it was a plan B for many people!

 5. How weather affects a trip to Lake Mburo.  In many ways, we got all the benefits of visiting a game park in Uganda-- look at the baby zebra! :) But, you can tell by the photos who dry and dusty the park was and if we return during rainy season you would really see the difference in the landscape.  And on a more sober note, many Ugandans are suffering from drought.



A last reflection... this year, as we did some different trips and found how much weather did affect our plans, it made me consider this analogy.  I think in many ways we could understand an African worldview more if we considered our powerlessness over weather.  When I was in NC, I was thinking that people must be so bummed that they spent thousands of dollars for a beach house during a rainy week.  But I also figured that they aren't really going to "sue" anyone regarding this reality, that they couldn't go cash in their "weather insurance" and try for another week.  We do understand that weather is out of our control, and that the best attitude is to sort of adapt and make the most of it.  I think due to so many systems that are out of the common rural Ugandan's control, they also tend to have a very similar attitude towards "out of control" factors (government, roads, corruption, medical options, water, power, etc, etc).  Marx said,  "Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people". I think in Marx's view, politicians and governments offer religion/faith to those who suffer to prevent them from taking control and rising up.  

We, as Americans especially, tend to assume so much control over most of life's factors. While this has many virtues, I think we are suffering consequences of "too much control" because when its all said and done, we don't control some of the biggest factors of a human life.  And by internalizing that responsibility, we end up in a false narrative where we will fail and our expectations can't be met.  We can't control our weather.  We can't number our days.  We can't make other people say, do, feel what we want them to.  We can't heal everything that needs healing.  I know this is sort of a rambling generalization, but I think I just felt that "weather" is a good analogy of something we don't control.  And the way we deal with that uncontrollable natural element, is perhaps a healthy way to think about other ways we might more humbly accept things that are out of control.  Obviously, I do think we need a faith narrative (whether we're poor or rich) because I don't think other explanations are sufficient for balancing personal responsibility and personal suffering.  





Cross-cultural moments for the files...

Post summer reflections from the kids:

1. Can I join the Parade? At a Memorial day parade, the kids discovered some cultural differences.  One, you can not join the parade.  In uganda, when you see a marching band, you often see the crowds fall in line behind the band and just join the fun.  In the US, a parade is more of a spectator sport.  Though perhaps you miss out on the fun of joining the parade, there is free flying candy in America to compensate! (though a neighbor said that last year there had been no candy because it was too dangerous)

2.  Which leads me to "Too many rules" in America: We went to Kennywood, and headed for the bumper cars because they were near the entrance to the park.  The kids had been to an amusement park here where the girls rode the bumper cars (Wonder world!)


But in America, the girls were too short and only Daniel could ride.  And it appears they don't want to use all the cars in the US because it becomes to dangerous.  In Uganda, we don't use all the cars because they don't work. :)

3. Poison the dogs, or throw a street festival: I don't have a picture of a dead dog (though we've lost some of our dogs to poison-- a means of keeping the wild dogs on campus to a minimum).  So, of course, it is a bit disorienting to go to a local street fair in Sewickley, PA that is designed for dogs!



The dog festival included a wading pool for dogs, doggie snacks for the dogs, costumes and photo back-drops for taking a photo with your pet, etc, etc.  It really was a street fair for dogs.  And I'm sure it is fun for all the dogs and dog-owners, but still a serious cross-cultural moment (our American care of pets verses the Ugandan fear of dogs due to rabies).

4. The arch-nemesis-- the automatic flushing toilet.  One of the stark moments of entering the "other" world is the bathroom.  Everything is automatic.  Daniel emerged from a toilet en route to somewhere and said, "I've just remembered my arch-nemesis, the automatic flushing toilet." Perhaps due to the height of kids the toilet seems to flush while the kids are on the seat, especially doing a longer duty.  I still have to enter the stall with Rachel and cover the little sensor light because she is afraid of it flushing on her.  No photo to accompany this paragraph for everyone's dignity! :)

5. Shoes at the door:  It is common practice (good manners) to leave your shoes at the door in Uganda--mostly so you don't track in dust or mud.  I was with a small group of USP students (the American students who come to study here at UCU) and one of them was trying to figure out what to do at her host family.  "I think I'm supposed to leave my shoes at the door but I don't know if I'm allowed to go and get them later".  I think she thought there was something elaborate about the custom but I think it's mainly a practical custom.  Despite my frustration at times as I trip over a pile of crocs at the door, I find it endearing that the kids won't enter a building without an unthinking habit of taking their shoes off.  Reminds me God commanding Moses to take his shoes off before coming near the burning bush.  That said, I do apologize to both sets of grandparents as there is a lot of time (and airconditioning) wasted in the process and there is often a pile of shoes very close to the front door that can become quite an eyesore!

Okay, these are various grown up shoes, but rachel after driving herself up to the door on her plastic boda-boda(motorcycle), also deposited her shoes.

6. Sunday school: Though I don't have pictures of church and sunday school in America, I have included a link to Sunday school several months ago (written by my friend, Mary Jane).  But the cultural discovery this summer is that sunday school has lots of activities, snacks and crafts-- and its so short in length!












Monday, July 15, 2013

Reflections this side of our trans-Atlantic summer vaca

Some advice from my wise mom...

1. Some advice from my wise mom--Vacation is not for moms, it is for kids. It is more work for moms.  It's perhaps a bit like a wedding; weddings are not for brides but for the families that brides and grooms represent.
"It's not about me" -- a basic camp slogan, but oh, so much harder in daily life!
2. Some advice from Mark--"It's worth it".  Mark has taught me this mantra to help me manage emotional days-- days, weeks and even months can be hard, can be what I don't want.  But are the things that are hard, unpleasant, not emotionally gratifying, part of a bigger "thing" that is worth it to me?  I know this is probably a basic principle that we learn our whole lives in different contexts-- a sort of "no pain, no gain" lesson.  But I think I'm learning it in the thick of family roles, trying to learn the maturity that the things that matter are not necessarily "fun" but are worthy of our sacrifice and delayed gratification.
My mom capturing a desperate moment when none of the dippin dots worked after a long negotiated truce with Daniel

3. Some indirect advice from all my peers (single, married, in hard seasons, in good seasons, in Uganda, in America, etc).  Life is a journey that requires our attention, our sense of humor, our adaptability, our faith/hope/love, and our friends and family to accompany us on said journey.

Despite some lousy weather, we did get beach time with Sarah and Angella
4. And advice by example from my kids (for theirs is the kingdom)-- play more, be outside, routine (esp food and sleep) is good, so are sweets.  But the best part of life is relationships--loving others and being loved.
The girls with their cousin Natasha in May

Top 14 Reasons I loved our trip to England

So strange, and sorry so belated... just found this in my drafts and not published!!! :)

This trip was from spring!

For a brief summary: The Buttons were our good friends who shared the first 8 years with us in Uganda.  Their kids were like siblings to Daniel, esp-- Alex sometimes held idol status, if truth be told.  Dan and Rosie are also godparents of Rachel.  Rosie is a reader, a mother, a fellow missionary, a friend without guile (as my one friend dubbed her), a wise and funny companion in our shared life in Uganda-- and now long distance as she transitions back to her homeland.  Dan has also been our family friend, a man who loves a good game, a good conversation, a humble leader in his roles, a man of mischief (our Daniel was so glad to be in England on April Fools Day--the patron holiday of Dan Button).  Abigail and Alex were amazing in hosting Daniel even after two years apart and very different experiences in the last two years.  I didn't include videos the kids made (of them all with panty hose on their faces), nor did I capture them riding down the stairs on an old mattress (those who know inside stories--it was the mattress of the daybed that is sitting in the Buttons garage), nor of Alex teaching Daniel to rollerblade.  But needless to say, the visit was a great time for Daniel and me-- both reconnecting, seeing the Buttons in their new life (work, church, home, town, etc) and re-remembering many times in Uganda.  And did I win in our Settlers game? I think so. :)

But now for top 14 pictured reasons that we loved our visit to the Buttons in England:
1. Being with my good friend, Rosie-- no matter what the temperature
2. Alex and Daniel reuniting like old friends-- here they are showing the scallop shell-- for my mom
3. Seeing Rosie and Frodo--a happy pair-- for walks, for company in seeking the sunshine of the house, for a companion in the domestic realm
4. For being in the land of anachronisms-- remember when we used public phones?
5. For watching others transition--in major ways and minor ones-- here we're laughing at the Maribu stork who is a very common "garbage-loving" bird who lives all over Kampala city.  I'm sure this Maribu stork is not thrilled to be in the freezing bird sanctuary in England. 

6. For fun-loving Dan who entered right into this snowball fight among other hosting moments!
7.  For Rosie's well-planned visit for us-- including day trips like this one to a Nature and Art museum-- a perfect match for our whole crowd. 
8. Watching friends on a similar life-trajectory,  figuring out how to be more responsible Christians in our daily lives-- here Rosie and Abigail and Alex are planting flowers, herbs and tomatoes. 

9. Joining in with the Buttons in their church life celebrations-- this is the Good Friday ecumenical service
10. Seeing Dan and Rosie settling into their lives and vocations in England--the following shots are from Redcliff College where Dan is teaching. 

Dan's top story office-- watch out for ceilings, and not quite enough room for all the books!

11.  Seeing the classic English countryside, full of hills and sheeps
12. Partaking in Rosie's yummy cooking and meal planning-- despite all slanders of British food, Rosie proved that local fare and local recipes are delicious!
13. Seeing Abby (and Alex) happy with their schools and their lives-- here Abby is in front of the oldest classroom in England-- where she currently studies science.  
14. Quality time with Daniel